HIGHS AND LOWS!

As suggested by the title, there have been some high points and some low points over the last three months.

For those who don't follow me on Twitter, don't worry, my health is fine(ish), though there have been a couple of complications there too, which I will detail at the other blog. (Here)

Work is going along okay, the boss has been pretty good since we cleared the air about our little misunderstanding earlier this year. He knows of my plan to move to Melbourne, but is not aware of my timetable as yet. I will break it to him fairly soon I think, as the time is coming ever closer.

The Brat is once again out of work, having been ripped off salary wise by his most recent employers. Now given his record for staying in any one position for any length of time is not exactly awesome, I don't for a second believe that he is without blame in the various scenarios which have led to his temporary bouts of unemployment. Sadly, he's actually very good at what he does, and he is in fact a good little worker. To a degree he has been unlucky. Hopefully his next position will see him out to the end of his apprenticeship and beyond. After that who knows? He may choose to join me in Melbourne, travel, or, my personal preference, join one of the armed services for a few years. I have to admit though, it's been nice having him around the last week or so.

My relationship is going really well. I don't know what exactly turned the tide, but J has gone from being a man who emphatically declared less than 12 months ago, that he will be single for the rest of his life... to asking me to move in with him when I finally do get to Melbourne. Maybe it was my cancer, or the enthusiastic reception our relationship has had from his friends and family, or maybe a combination of the two.  Sadly his Dad was also diagnosed with cancer, and as a result of other medical conditions, his treatment options were somewhat limited. He is currently under palliative care - which involves Morphine, as much as he needs, and is unlikely to survive the week. I saw him a couple of weeks ago when my best friend treated me to a weekend in Melbourne for J's birthday. Sad to see a strong, proud man reduced to the extent he was, and less than 24 hours after I returned home, he was in hospital. He is still a proud man, and the frustration in his eyes when he struggled to understand or be understood, was heartbreaking. I hope to make it back for his funeral, but that will depend on when, as my treatment has to be my priority.

Some of you will know that I had planned to be living in Melbourne by now, but obviously the cancer came along and delayed my plans. My next plan was to wait until I have my 12 month mammogram in June, then head off once I have the all clear. I am now moving my timetable forward, with the blessing of my Doctors. When I am ready they will transfer all of my records to the appropriate Doctors in Melbourne, and I can have all of my follow ups down there. So I am planning now on a move late March or early April 2011.  J and I are both excited and impatient, but obviously it would be foolish to do anything until my active treatment is finished.

My parents.... well what can I say. There are subtle indications that Mum is beginning to accept the inevitability of my move. It will be a long time before she likes it though, if ever. Still, she has joined a bowling league, and talked Dad into joining the RSL, in an attempt to broaden their social circle. So far it seems to be working, and as they settle into new friendships, hopefully my move won't be as devastating as she thinks it will. There was a major hissy fit when I went to Melbourne a couple of weeks ago, but my current tactic is to ignore the tantrum, and eventually she settles down. She wouldn't drop me at the airport or pick me up on my return though.

I had breakfast this morning with some of the Burger crew. Good food and company, but once again no photos. D'Uh! I even made a point of locating and taking my camera and then forgot to use it! There are plans afoot to catch up again in the New Year, and I look forward to that. I'm also keen to see and meet more of the Melbourne Burgers, once I move.

So for now, I continue with my treatment, and prepare for Christmas. My younger sister will be here with her partner and the kids. My older sister was going to be here, but unfortunately will be unable to make it. I am looking forward to it, it will be a distraction from my treatment (which continues through my short break).

Given my track record, I suspect I won't be back with an update before Christmas, so to all my friends, have a safe and happy Christmas, or whichever celebration you prefer. Thank you again for your wisdom, support and friendship, and I will see you all around the Twitterverse, or on facebook, or the varios Blogs we frequent, until we catch up in person.

Well I DIDN'T LIE Exactly.....

Actually, I DID get very inspired reading Mr Flinthart's chronicles of his trip to Borneo.... particularly the stuff about food. So inspired and nostalgic in fact, that I decided to do something a little different and blog about some of my own experiences and memories growing up in that part of the world.

Unfortunately, halfway through I DID get somewhat unwell. After that I DID get quite happy (Thanks to some friends who shall remain nameless). Sadly the Happy DID make me somewhat woozy, and I consequently DID fail to gather enough momentum to continue....

So this post is not the one I had originally planned, but Meh! It will have to do.

Yesterday was my Birthday. Not one of those significant number birthdays, but a birthday nonetheless. Now the thing about my birthday is, given I was born on Father's Day way back when, my birthday is usually only a few days either side, and thus tends to end up a shared celebration. Even my 40th, which fell on a Monday was celebrated in fine style at a beautiful restaurant, with my family, on Father's Day with every other diner there to celebrate Father's Day. It just didn't feel special.... and to cap it off, thank you Crocodile Hunter for dying on my actual 40th birthday. Now how the hell did this turn into a rant about my birthday??? It wasn't meant to, so rant over!

Back to yesterday.... and actually it ties in kinda neatly with the original post I had planned. You see, since my diagnosis, some of the people I have reconnected with are people who have been in my life as long as I remember. RAAF people, whose families have shared many experiences with mine, and particularly the Malaysian experiences. It occurred to me that we have all become so terribly busy that we almost never see each other. None of us live all that far apart, yet we never get together. One of the boys has been back in Brisbane more than 5 years, and I haven't seen him, or met his wife of 15 years, or his kids, in fact I haven't seen A in about 20 years. Similar situation with his brother, though in our defense, he and his family do live in Canberra. Anyhoo, I was determined that the phrase "we really need to get together" was no longer going to be just a throwaway line. I was going to make it happen!

The opportunity presented itself when my older sister decided that she would visit for my birthday. It was as much a matter of this being a "good" weekend for me, just prior to scheduled chemo, as anything else. So I made the calls. First to Mum, to see if she would mind hosting a little shindig. She was all in favour, so I called A, while Mum called his parents. Then I rang K, and she was enthusiastic, and fortuitously her Mum would be here that weekend from her home up north. I then had a call from A's brother P, the one who lives in Canberra. He was keen as well, and decided to try and arrange a shift swap, so he could make a flying visit. Sadly that didn't happen, but the rest of it did!

So for about 6 hours, we sat and ate, and drank and talked. And talked and talked. There are children who now know more about their grandparents than they ever wanted to! There are older children who now know more about their PARENTS, than they ever wanted to.... I had NO idea of some of the things my folks got up to over in the tropics! We reminisced about everything, the food, the locals, the RAAF School and the Swimming Pool. We remembered old friends, some of whom are gone, some of whom we have recently reconnected with, some of whom we would love to have back in our lives. We remembered the care packages we all received when my Grandma came to vist.... fresh Aussie beef, milk, cream, vegemite, and most importantly the LOLLIES! Minties, Bananas, lots of lollies that tasted nothing like Durian. For more info about Durian and other exotic food pop over here: http://dirkflinthart.blogspot.com/2010/08/extreme-food-tourism.html Dirk did it so much better than I could have anyway!

All in all, a brilliant day.... not because it was my birthday, (that was a happy coincidence - I can tell you now, if my birthday was the weekend AFTER chemo it wouldn't have happened this way), but because it was amazing to be with these people again. It makes me wonder why we wait until a life changing event occurs, before we reconnect with the people who have been special in our lives. Life's short, anything can happen, and we need to be mindful of that. Three of the people who were at that table yesterday have had cancer battles (2 of us from my generation). I am SO glad we had yesterday, and we are determined that it WON'T be another 5 years, or 20, we will be in each others lives again, SOON!

And the best thing? I have a new friend, A's wife is fantastic!

Something Different - Under Construction.

Sorry , bit too woozy to finish tonight, will came back to it tomorrow!

Just 2 MORE SLEEEPS!!!

Just sayin'.....

12 Sleeps.....

Well the dreary details of that other part of my life are over at the other joint, but there is still plenty of other stuff to chat about.

The title of this post refers of course to my man's imminent arrival in Brisbane. His visit will intersect with Mum and Dad's absence in Northern NSW for a holiday with my sister, her partner and the kids. He will arrive on Wednesday the 30th, and leave on Thursday the 8th. We will hopefully take a long weekend and bugger off up or down the coast, assuming of course that we can find accommodation during the school holidays. My Mother is being her usual pigheaded self about him and as far as I know doesn't even know that he will be here. She will be back before he leaves, so if Dad doesn't, or hasn't already, told her, she will be surprised to find him in residence on her return. Her problem, not mine, and as she was away in Cairns last weekend I took the opportunity to sit my Dad down, and let him know what's happening, and that Mum needs to stop hassling me about it. His response was that I am old enough to make my own decisions and do what I want to do, but Dad's not an easy man to read, so I have no idea how he really feels about this relationship. He has said all the right things, and I have decided to take that at face value. It was however, VERY funny, sitting with the nurse at the hospital the other day, with my Mum beside me, discussing the need for safe sex and condoms, wondering if she had a clue that it was in fact all very relevant information. I couldn't bring myself to look at her in case I burst out laughing.

I had lunch a couple of weeks ago in Brisbane with my man's sister. She's a flight attendant and has recently started having overnights in Brisbane. Apparently she will be here again for a couple of nights while her brother is here, so we will both catch up with her again during his visit. Given she's barely seen him since my last visit to Melbourne, she'll probably see more of him while they're both here than she does at home.

The Brat has settled into his new job at Cha Cha Char, a steak restaurant close to the Brisbane River. He's very happy there, the staff are great, there is so far no sign of the bullying culture we have come to expect, and Chef has been great about my situation, and let him know there's no problem if he needs time off. It's unlikely he will, but good to know all the same. He has also recently participated in the Under 21 National Europen Handball Championships in Sydney. Now THAT'S a very strange sport, very fast and intense, and even though he has not played a lot of it, his basketball background ensured The Brat slotted in as a top player immediately.

Unfortunately he hasn't been feeling terribly well... nothing specific, just generally flat. He took himself off to the Doctor this evening, and they have decided to repeat the blood tests they did when he had Glandular Fever earlier this year. He also made the decision to avoid alcohol completely for a while, as it's become harder for him to just have a few social drinks. He finds he is writing himself off every time he drinks, and mindful of the history of alcoholism in my Dad's side of the family, he thinks it would be a good idea to lay off. Also his liver function tests weren't crash hot when he had the Glandular Fever, so that may be concerning him a bit as well. I know for a fact that he first started drinking very heavily when he was at his last job, as the stress of that situation was really getting to him. Now, even though there is the Cancer issue hanging over us, he obviously feels strong enough to cope without booze, at least for a time. Hopefully peer pressure won't drag him off the wagon, but it's a possibility he recognises and thinks he can withstand. I am EXTREMELY proud of him for having made this decision off his own bat.

Not much to report on the job front, as I haven't been there for a couple of weeks, but my boss has been amazing since my diagnosis and will continue to support my need for days or half days off to attend various appointments. I'm fortunate that I have a reasonable amount of leave up my sleeve, and more due in September. He won't quibble about advancing me leave if that becomes necessary. I return to work on Monday, and my biggest concern is getting through the days without a Nanna Nap.

Okay, that's about it... I promise not to report in daily with the countdown.... but will be back when there is more to report. May need to wait until after the visit, unless something exciting happens in the meantime.

Second Site

Since my cancer diagnosis, I have been posting little bits of information at various places, (thanks Catty and Madam M for allowing me to hijack your places), but haven't blogged here yet. I'm a bit reluctant, as I don't want this cancer to define me, I still want my blog to be about my life, my friends, family and experiences, and I don't want the cancer to take over. On the other hand I DO want to be able to keep you informed, and maybe vent a little. Solution: TWO blogs.


This is where I will report in: tests, doctors, laughter, tears, frustrations and triumphs. Most posts will be short updates on daily occurrences and just generally how I'm travelling. Hopefully it won't just turn into a dirge, but frankly if that happens so be it. The rest of my life will continue to be chronicled here.


Drop in to http://mayhem-oflaughterandtears.blogspot.com/ if you want to, or don't. Your call! If you go there you will know what to expect, and I won't be upset or offended if you choose not to. This is mainly for me anyway. An opportunity to express my myself.

The Havock Fiasco Weekend

It pretty much started with the tweets announcing the revered God's arrival, followed by some frantic searching for same and Jugger author John Birmingham, on behalf of Monster Yuppy who would like to join them for lunch. Epic FAIL as both gents had turned their phones off... clever boys!

Arrived at Claret House around 6:30 or so to find most attendees assembled and well away. We were awaiting the arrival only of the Boss and the magic Bedes. I think Beeso, Abe and SpyNat were intent on sampling every beer on the menu. At some point in the evening I handed my camera to SpyNat, who played with it for a while and then handed it on to Havock, and made myself scarce. If you've seen my one and only vaguely recognisable photo from the Tassie Babes post, you know why I did that, though in my defense Havock did take some that were similarly apalling on Friday night.

Beeso and Monster Yuppy

I have met both of these gents before, but it was good to catch up with them and this time I actually managed to have a conversation with the Monster.

JB and Abe Frellman

The first time I have had the pleasure of meeting "The Sausage King from Queanbeyan" and appropriately The Boss ordered a sausage salad which went down very well! (Okay it was Chorizo salad and it was very nice). This photo should also allay the fears of non-attendees that we Brisbane Burgers have turned into a bunch of wussses who have forsaken alcomohol! Abe it was a pleasure! I will echo other commentators who are very impressed with JB's svelte suave look.

The lovely SpyNat, with Bedes and The Boss.

(Sorry Bedes, Havock seems to have saved all the front on shots of you for his phone)

Nat it was a pleasure, if you're ever at a loose end around lunch time, pop in to the office and we'll have lunch.

And of course the ratbag who needs no introduction....

The God himself...

HAVOCK

Now I met Havock briefly in Melbourne in March, and he seemed a nice guy! He is!

So Saturday night was fun, good conversation and food, and plenty of booze, except for me, I was driving. At the end of the night I bravely offered to drop Havock and Abe at their respective lodgings, and SpyNat home. I say bravely, because I have absolutely no illusions about my sense of direction. Frankly, it SUX. Still, I lined up the lovely Nat to navigate, and our little expedition set off (after a quick tidy up of the car - sorry about that folks). And an expedition it certainly was. All went swimmingly to the point where we dropped Abe in Roma Street. And that's when we came unstuck. Disregard anything you may read elsewhere, we did NOT circle the CBD eight times, it was four at the most. And with each circuit it was funnier, and we got sillier. We ended up dropping the great one on a corner, with SpyNat yelling at him out the window "That's Wickham Terrace, I'm sure it is", and then "Look, there's a street sign, I told you it was Wickham Terrace" Luckily, that particular corner was in fact close to Hav's accoms, and he made it home safe and sound. As did Nat and I, eventually! We cooked up a story that the whole situation was deliberate, we just couldn't bear to let Havock go, we couldn't get enough of his scintillating company.. yada yada.

I don't think he bought it.

I think I redeemed myself on Saturday though. Having finished my errands earlier than expected, I phoned Havock and arranged to collect him from the city for our lunch at Fiasco Steakhouse. Didn't get lost even once, and the ONLY reason we ended up doing yet ANOTHER blocky, was because there was no way to enter the restaurant carpark from the direction in which we were travelling. We were joined in due course by Quokka and her Bloke, then Bedes. Don't know about the others, but I thoroughly enjoyed my chicken. Bedes, I meant to ask you how your steak was? I assume it was okay, because it was well and truly gone. I think Havock learned a valuable lesson during that little gathering. Do NOT let Simon Bedak play with you smart phone EVER. Havsy's probably still trying to work out who all these vaguely suss new Twitter mates are! Another enjoyable couple of hours, after which I headed home, having woken up with a nasty headache, and being seriously not in the mood to stay out all afternoon before fronting up to Tassie Babes.

A couple of hours sleep, headache minimised, and off to Tassie Babes. I arrived quite early, as The Brat dropped me in then headed back to watch the football with his Nanna. I had a quick look at twitter, and discovered that a bunch of Burgers was having dinner right next door to the BAT. (Is bunch the correct collective noun for the Burgers? It seems a bit tame somehow.. any suggestions gratefully received). So I gatecrashed their dinner for a little while, before heading back to the play.

Tassie Babes, again what can I say? An absolute riot, had a ball once again. All involved are to be congratulated. GirlClumsy, love your work. Your cast, your crew, and of course the Author and Playwright! And Saturday night was chance to catch up with NBob, GirlClumsy, Medway and Albion Love Den. Also met Albion's lovely wife Satomi, Ysambart, Mick H, JanetELeach and assorted others. God I hope I haven't missed anyone! The one sour note was learning that Moko and his wife had run into major traffic problems on their way in, and weren't going to make it. You were missed mate! The Urinal presentation was another burst of hilarity, then chatting and catching up for a little while longer. After the show The Brat showed up to convey me homeward, and I let him know that we would be taking a couple of passengers, The Brat was cool with that, with one proviso. Nat was NOT allowed to navigate! I assured him that Nat had arranged other transportation, and we had Abe and Havock reasonably close to their respective quarters in short order.

Sunday, I had hoped to round off the weekend with a trip up to Redcliffe to meet Big Bad Al. Sadly the headache which had lurked all Saturday, returned with a vengeance. Decided to stay home and sleep it off. I will tell you all now though, if I can go out, have one glass of wine and end up with a monster hangover, from here on in I'm going to make sure I bloody well deserve it!

All in all a fabulous weekend. Great company, great food, and lots and lots of laughs. I doesn't get better than that!

Now, just because I can, and to counter that revolting photo Havock has of me on his blog, I'm going to post a couple more photos of past meetings with other burgers . Now I'm definitely not the most inspiring photography subject, but I think these ones are a LITTLE bit better!

With Medway and the Fabulous Girl Clumsy. This is an older one, but both were present Saturday night, and I didn't manage to get pics of them there.

With Havock and Bangar in Melbourne

With Catty in Melbourne on her birthday